the network for radical unschooling families

"Homed"

I read a comment by a teacher about homeschooling: "So many of these children are not being schooled at all. They're simply being 'homed.'" I wish I could remember where exactly it was I saw that online.

Anyway, her comment stuck with me. Stepping into my unschooling paradigm, it's easy to dismiss the idea of not being schooled. That's fine.

And being homed is great!

Anyway, my thought on all that is that a paradigm shift is all it takes to see things in an entirely different light. I can see that a teacher would *not* see a child being "homed" as a positive idea in the absence of the child's schooling.

Interesting.

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by zenmomma on July 27, 2008 at 2:32pm: Too cool.

I'm sure that teacher meant the comment as a put down. I take it as a compliment. Taking the school out ofour lives completely has been my focus for a long time. But we're not *always* home.

Lifed?; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Katherine on July 27, 2008 at 3:46pm: Isn't it amazing the number of words we can "verb"alize?

Lifed: to have lived life
Homed: to have a haven for your soul, maybe; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Julie B on July 27, 2008 at 4:21pm: It was always so fun for me when I was "teaching" and homeschooling came up to give it my wholehearted support and tell people that I planned on being a homeschooler when I had kids.

My fellow teachers just automatically assumed that we'd have a nice, fun bitch session about how inadequate an incoming students' skills were and how their parents had finally come to their senses by sending them schoolward. I loved the shock when they realized they were talking to a lunatic.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by laura b on July 30, 2008 at 7:29am: ooh, mememe, sign me up...i wanna be "homed" too!!! that sounds so cozy and wonderful and comforting!!

what about "loved" or "enjoyed"

"do your kids go to school?"
"no, we are enjoying them."

oooh...

of course, that makes it sound like schooled children aren't loved or enjoyed and i guess that's sort of unfair. but i still like it...mwahahaha; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Jane B on July 30, 2008 at 7:43am: yes, a haven for your soul, you yourself becoming your own home, a place of peace and contentment, where your skin fits just right and who you are is just that, nothing less, nothing more; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Vicki on July 30, 2008 at 10:57am: Teachers have been trained that learning happens by certain parameters and when we buck the system, they feel the need to attack or at least try to point out why their way is better. The interesting part is that their way has been proven time and time again, not to really work for everyone.

In my personal experience with unschooling and watching my children is that they learn more and faster then their peers who are forced into a curriculum style of learning. My 10yo is constantly researching all types of interesting things because he is interested in the world. By following his lead, he moves at a much more indepth and faster pace. There are no time constraints saying it's time to move on to the next task. There are no rules to reading for half an hour a day. Lol, he'd hate the restriction! The concept of children can and do enjoy learning just doesn't seem to be able to be grasped by some people.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Heidi Snavley on July 30, 2008 at 3:15pm: It is interesting the different perspectives of people unfamiliar with unschooling. I like what someone said at the St. Louis Live and Learn Conference, in regards to "socialization" - they said, "I would rather have civilized than socialized". It's sad that at some point our society thought it better for children to be socialized by an institution rather than the family. I'm so thankful that my children turn to their family first, rather than their peers because they have been "homed", love that word! Home is my children's safe haven, their soft place to land, the place where they are honored and loved unconditionally.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Ren on July 30, 2008 at 8:03pm: "I would rather have civilized than socialized"

It was me.
But I had heard that term from someone back in the mid-90's when we were first starting this journey. It struck a chord with me and you know how I love quotes.;); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Katherine on August 1, 2008 at 6:05am: I do think school children can be just as loved as unschooled children. The difference might be that many children are in school precisely because their parents don't know what to do with them or how to stand spending much time with them. For me, it's so worth it to learn what to do myself rather than sending Karl off to school so I won't have to mess with it.

Ren and Heidi brought up socialization.... the family as the basis of social life rather than school as the bedrock of all things social for children. What a concept that is! Learning from others (parents) who know more rather than learning from peers who are in the same boat and don't know much either could definitely be the difference between socializing and civilizing influences. You don't even need to meet unschooled children to see the difference there. I have met many homeschooled (and now unschooled) children who are soooooo different from school children. They talk to babies and adults as easily as peers, and from my limited experience thus far, the unschooled children seem to have the easiest most confident manner.

I just spent time with unschoolers Jessica and Rob-- visiting while out of town. Their children, Aleah and Tyler, approached *me,* struck up several conversations during our (mine and Karl's) visit and were the perfect hosts, being a mere 5 and 8 years old! Now that's cool.

Let's just say they've been homed.; ▶ Reply to This