Starting an unschooling support group... Suggestions, advice, your own experiences on the matter, and tanything else you want to add is much appreciated!

[Idzie]

I'm an 18 year old unschooler, and a strong supporter of unschooling. I genuinely believe it is the best educational philosophy out there, and that much of my happiness, healthiness, confidence, and all those other great things are thanks to the non-mainstream way I've grown up and learned. However, it was always hard for my family when my sister (now nearly 16) and I were younger, since the only homeschoolers in the area were a VERY Christian, very school-at-home bunch. Not to say that's bad, just to say that my family really didn't fit in! I think that when a family chooses to step outside the mainstream, and follow a very non-traditional life's path, dealing with the reactions of those around them can be very difficult if you don't have a support network, people who can validate your choices, and share their own experiences living as unschooers in a very schooled society.

SO, actually getting to the point, my mother and I have decided to try, once again (last Winter we were going to try and get a group together, but then we found out someone else was trying to start an unschooling group, so we met with a few unschoolers through that, BUT it ended up falling through) to start an unschooling support group. We have a few ideas, but I'd love to get more ideas, suggestions, advice, etc., especially from people who've started similar groups!

Oh, and by the way, since I neglected to mention this earlier, we live in the Montreal area, and are looking to advertise this across the Island of Montreal, as well as off the West Island as far as Richaud. So, as well as looking for advice, I'm also looking for anyone who lives in this area and would be interested! I know Bea lives here (*waves hi!*) but I don't know if anyone else does...

Thanks a bunch for any and all replies!

Peace,
Idzie
http://yes-i-can-write.blogspot.com/

[Bea Mantovani]

Hi!!!!
I am, of course, very interested. I know a few families with younger children who might be interested too.
I don't have suggestions, but please keep me posted (and I would love to help if I can.)

[Sybelle van Erven]

Hello Idzie,
I can relate to you and your mom's wish to have more of a tribe around you. Several years ago a friend and I were inspired to start a group here in the Tucson AZ area. We had gone to the Live and Learn Conference and someone there was very willing to share ideas.
Basically we started with a yahoo group. We specified that it was for unschoolers only (and not those thinking about it, or with kids still in school, etc.) and that it was a local group. From that it has grown into a nice group of families, who rely on each other for support and as a social network. It really is a successful group.
I believe it is very important to know first what kind of families you'd like to attract. For that, it helps a lot to go look at the description of other unschoolers groups. You can read ours here: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SOARingUnschoolers/ . Specifically thinkn about the people you would not want to have in your group and then think of a way to describe your group to discourage those from joining. For us, the only way for people to join us is through personal invitaion by a member or through the yahoo gorup. If aomeone is interested they mail the moderator, who then asks several questions to decide whther they will fit the group. Remember, if you start a group, you are the one deciding.
Once you ahve two families, you can start doing fun stuff together.
My only regret is that the group has very very few families with teens in them. So for my family, it has not served the purpose we had hoped for. My friend has litle kids and that's all the group consists of, so for her it has really been great. And I am glad to know there is a group of families in our area that is able to grow up together with fast friends who think like they do! We really miss that for ourselves. It was of course why I started the group. As my kids grew into teens I found that more and more of their homeschooled friends are stuck at home doing school work and losing the freedom to just be together and live their lives. Very unfortunate...
It may also help to place notices up in health food stores, libraries, book stores, etc. Those are places frequently visited by unschoolers, so someone may see your notice and contact you.
Good luck on forming your group!
Sybelle

[Bonnie]

Hi Idzie! I've seen your blog before, nice to see you on RUN.

I joined our local unschooling group after it started so I'm not sure *exactly* how it got going, but I know it helps a ton to have a Yahoo or other email list. One thing our group did that helped a lot was to have a membership application with a few questions to check if people are really interested in unschooling. Most everyone who applied has gotten in, but we've had to tell a few people (politely but firmly) that our group probably wasn't going to be a good fit for them, because they were obviously not unschooling and didn't seem interested in letting go of their structure.

We also got our group featured on a local website that lists activities for kids. So far it's drawn in only a few new people, but our group is definitely growing.

[Idzie]

@Bea That's great! I'll certainly keep you posted, and thanks, help is always welcome! :-)

@Amanda Driving in Montreal isn't always fun, at least according to my mom (I don't drive, since I don't think driving of any sort is fun! :-P)! There's always public transit, which is my travel method of choice. :-) It's a lovely city, and if you're ever up here, you should come visit our hopefully successful unschooling group! My father is Francophone, my mother Anglophone. When I was a young child, first learning to speak, I knew as many words in French as English. However, my parents spoke to each other in English, so when I actually started putting sentences together, I did so in English. So I'm not fluently bilingual... I can, however, both understand and read read French half decently, I just can't speak it! Being a perfectionist, I hate my imperfect accent, and don't like speaking French because of that... I'm working on that block, though, because I don't feel it's a good thing! Thanks! I hope the group is a success.

@Sybelle Thanks for all the great suggestions! It's great to hear from someone who's started their own group. I like the way you phrased things for your group's Yahoo page... I see what you mean about wording being important in what type of people you attract! Definitely something for me to think about. I'd love to connect with other unschooling teens in the Montreal area, but I really don't expect many (or possibly any) to join this group, since I'm not sure there are any others in this area! It would be wonderful if I'm wrong, but I'm not really expecting to be... I laughed when I read your suggestions for where to advertise the group, because I was talking to my mother just the other day and saying that I think the best place to find unschoolers are libraries and health food stores! :-D Book stores also sound like a good idea, and I also think I'll post stuff in a couple of vegetarian and vegan restaurants I know of... Thanks a bunch for all your ideas! :-)

@Bonnie I'm going to make a Yahoo group sometime in the next couple of days. For some reason I actually hadn't thought of that until I saw these comments, so thanks! Having an application sounds like it might be a good idea. I really want the group to be very inclusive, but at the same time I want to make it clear that it is NOT a place for homeschoolers to discuss their favorite curriculum. This is going to be an unschooling group, and only people who really believe, or are seriously interested, in unschooling should join!

[Bea Mantovani]

One question: will the group be bilingual? Some of the unschoolers I know are more comfortable using French.

[Idzie]

That's a hard one... I thought about whether to advertise as a bilingual group or not, and came to the conclusion that I couldn't really. My French isn't very good at all. I couldn't respond to peoples inquiries via email, or have conversations, in French. So I decided I would advertise the group all in English, as in any pamphlets, posts online, etc., about the group would be in English, but I would happily welcome anyone, regardless of first language... So I see it as being a *mainly* English group, while still welcoming francophones...

Bea Mantovani said:

One question: will the group be bilingual? Some of the unschoolers I know are more comfortable using French.

[Idzie]

I now have a Yahoo! group for the local support group I'm starting, entitled UnschoolingMontreal, up and running! Even if you live no where near Montreal, I'd love to get your feedback on the welcome message etc.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingmontreal/

Thanks a bunch!!

Peace,
Idzie
http://yes-i-can-write.blogspot.com/

[diana (hahamommy)]

I'm gonna reply before reading responses - forgive me!
The term "support" kinda scares me, I gotta admit. Mostly because I envision a setting with lots of hand/head patting and "Oh that's okay, you did the best you could" - which doesn't lead (quickly anyway) to the internal change required for successful unschooling. Now that isn't to say I don't appreciate a "hey, we all blow it!" from my friends, I do. What I need after that, however, is a "So, whatcha gonna do next time to avoid getting back to point A??" discussion.

That said, advertise, advertise, advertise! Throw parties, ask people to invite one other family, have opportunities for conversations while hoola hooping and boffer swording and bon firing (as at my house!)... Bring out Sandra's thinking sticks ;) Go places and let as many people know as you can, that "there will be unschoolers over at X!!"

worst case scenario, move to b.c. ;D