Laughing at sad children

[Sandra Dodd]

On CBS Sunday Morning, they're talking about letters from camp of kids begging parents to pick them up because they're not having fun. There's a book (might not be new) called P.S. I Hate It Here!: Kids' Letters from Camp But they're laughing at the kids about asking for help, by mail, which took effort to write, and days to receive. VERY sad. And the article is presented in a totally "isn't that cute" way. :-/ A camp counsellor said, "Eventually the letters always become more upbeat." "You're left with some genuine hilarity," the editor said.

It was sad to hear it.
Summer camp is not the tradition in New Mexico. I had a wealthy friend who used to go to Brush Ranch camp, but it's not even open as it was then, as far as I know.

[laura bowman]

you're welcome =)

and i know you're not objecting to traditional camps, neither am i...but i do object to the book and the tv show and similar attitudes. the people behind that sort of thing were probably laughed at as kids. and so it goes...

[Sandra Dodd]

-=-there ARE good camp experiences to be had!!-=-

Some kids love the rough, tough traditional camps too. I'm not objecting to camp, but to someone collecting and talking on TV about those sad letters as if they're the funniest humor ever!

Thanks for those links on a camp designed to avoid those fears and sorrows though!!

[laura bowman]

very very sad!!!! kids should never be made fun of for wanting to come home or needing their parents!! peggy pirro wrote an awesome blog post about her experiences at my camp, etusc (east tennessee unschooled summer camp) this month. she touches on this very thing, about kids need for a safe place. some parents came to camp for this very reason, just in case their kids needed them. and they did. and it was okay.
"Parent volunteers had rooms in a building down the way a bit, nearby but not exactly central to the main area, so we could stay out of the way if we wanted to and still remain accessible if our kids needed us, or needed a cool place to hang out or sleep, since our rooms were air-conditioned and theirs weren't. A couple kids took advantage of that option, and nobody shamed them, or suggested they toughen up, or accused the parents of mollycoddling. The kids were hot, the rooms were cool, sleep was needed. Needs were met. Would that the whole world could work so well." -peggy pirro
read the whole thing here...it will make you smile!! there ARE good camp experiences to be had!!
http://crooked5280.blogspot.com/2010/08/dispatch-from-planet-unscho...

here is a blogpost written by one of my campers:
http://sarahdancer753.wordpress.com/2010/08/20/east-tennesse-unscho...

[Maggie Johnson]

Yup, sad. I went to the trouble of phoning my YMCA camp in rural ky ahead, pretending i was my mother and explaining that i would be leaving early for a family function.........that family function was really my friend Marhsall who was good enough to come and free me from singing "Rise and shine and give god the glory" by the campfire............I was "busted" later in the week as i recall and i'm sure grounded-ironic!! I am sure that i went the letter writing route too as a smaller girl, I so appreciate that my son will not experience that disconnect and yes it is sad to see a child's hand crafted pleas laughed off...............wierd too!

[Scott]

Interesting topic. I suppose it depends a bit on how long the camp goes and how it is run. I went to a few of these as a kid and I think they were all 1 or 2 weeks. I don't recall writing or calling home or being sad per se myself. I have heard there are much longer camps and I suppose at these they probably sit the kids down and have them write letters periodically.

One camp was 5th and 6th grade school camp. This was pretty fun. Lots of interesting things to do like canoeing and archery and shooting guns at targets. The highlight was always the all-day, 20 mile hike through the forest. Plenty of down time during which we were free to wander off if we liked. Technically we weren't supposed to leave a certain area but I didn't follow that. Really no complaints about these camps. The food was probably decent too, if it wasn't I'd have remembered. These were sponsored by the elementary school and I believe this camp was free or of nominal cost. It was like an extended field trip.

The best camp was the one that was a reward for being a crossing guard in 6th grade. The police department sponsored it since they ran the crossing guard program. The great thing about this one is the police had brought lots of bicycles, a wider selection of rifles and bows, nicer kayaks and maybe even a few sailboats. Best of all, they were not experienced camp counselors who had spent much time devising educational programs and there was little strict supervision. I spent nearly the whole camp wandering off all day into the woods by myself and looking for berries and acorns, studying rotting wood, climbing up rocks. Never a problem finding the way back.

The worst camp was the year I went to a church camp. The camp counselors were students studying to be pastors. This was strictly programmed and you had to be accounted for at all times. Any perceived infraction resulted in punishment.

One day I was so tired of the programming I escaped from a group and went into the woods and sat on a rock for an hour. When I returned I found there had been a man hunt. I claimed to have been reading in the cabin and not heard them.

One night we were all unexpectedly woken up at 2AM, lined up against the wall and interrogated regarding "who left the cabin". No one knew anything about this. The demands for answers went on for some time. At last, we were told we had one last chance and if the person who left the cabin did not confess what he did, all of us would be punished. No one stepped forward. Then the name of the person was revealed. He was as surprised as anyone and said "Do you mean when I went to the bathroom? I didn't know you meant that, I was only gone a few minutes!" No excuses though, one must ask and receive permission to pee at night, to our surprise. We were then marched to the camp headmaster's office and lined up. One by one we were required to enter his office, remove our pants and underwear, bend over grabbing our ankles, and then were violently beaten until blistered, in some cases bleeding, with a large heavy wooden paddle with holes drilled in it designed for this purpose. Then we were allowed to return to the cabin.

Every element of this last fiasco was so outrageous I never forgot it. I certainly didn't learn a positive lesson. Only that these were irrational psychopaths who could not be trusted and the world could be a dangerous and horrible place.

I can't recall exactly how old I was when this one happened. It might have been before the other ones, maybe when I was 8 or so. Many later as an adult I was reflecting on a curious incident there that had never made sense - several nights in the bunk next to mine one of the pastoral students/camp counselors came to visit the boy there. As a child I knew there was something strange about this but I didn't know what it was. As an adult I realized suddenly and with horror that the boy was being molested.

When my father picked me up from camp I told him about the beatings. I think he did have some words with the camp headmaster. I never went back to that one again. I don't think he ever realized how it was. Most the two weeks were OK except too programmed with little freedom. But the night we were beaten without even a justification for any punishment whatsoever, much less a beating, well that is what defines that entire experience.

Some summer camps can good. Some great. Some are really more concentration camps than anything else. I know for one thing, I would never send my kids to a religious camp of any kind whatsoever. There are too many abusers attracted to churches because they know it is a place they can hide without suspicion.

More likely we take the kids camping ourselves. Right now they really like cub scout camp. It's just a weekend thing and no long hikes, but they get to do canoeing and archery and campfires and scavenger hunts.

[Sandra Dodd]

http://sandradodd.com/negativity

[Sandra Dodd]

-=-it's important to have a place where we can talk about that to make it change.-=-

We can't change it in their lives, but we can prevent it for our children, who might then be kinder to theirs.

-=- Born into a violent, rotten world-=-

EEEK! you should shake that off, so that your children aren't living with a mom who sees the world as violent and rotten.

[Edith]

Thank you Sandra for sharing this horrible thing, it's important to have a place where we can talk about that to make it change.

Marina, I think the explanation is that people are so manipulated, abused by the system they do not even see they are doing the same thing to their children. Born into a violent, rotten world, how can we get to realize this, and refuse it, and then try to offer something different to our children? You and me, we do it, but look at the efforts it requires from us ... and with what a coincidence, what star who bright for us one day to awaken ?

Pray, talk about it... and change everything you can change !

Edith

P.S. Sorry for my bad english

[Marina Gale]

That is so sad. Can't believe some people... how could parents leave sad kids there in the first place