Some Questions About Art

[Chessa]

I've been struggling to find my place (role?) in my 2.5 year-old's art journey. I've already written about how I have a bit of visual art-o-phobia. I've been doing some thinking and came up with some questions.

Do you do art WITH your child? If your child is say, painting, do you paint with him/her? Or do you sit and watch? Or do something unrelated nearby, but check in often (i.e. fold laundry)?

I know this is probably individual to both the parent and child's disposition. I guess where I'm coming from is reading in a few art books (Susan Striker's) that parent's should NOT model doing the art for the child, because we will automatically limit their expression if they see the parent doing it a particular way (whether it's the "right" way or not). So I've tried really hard to just let Silas do the art his own way.

But he often says, "Mama, you draw, too," and I feel weird about saying No. I usually say, "No, I like to watch you draw." But then he usually gets bored and goes on to something else (even if I'm sitting right there with him).

What do you think? Do you think that parents doing art WITH their child automatically limits their experience with the materials?

I want Silas to have as much freedom as possible to express himself. But I also, personally, know the feeling of being overwhelmed by too many possibilities.

I know toddlers LOVE to imitate the adults in their lives (the words that come out of Silas's mouth attest to this fact, unfortunately!). So where does creative expression fit in? Silas dances his own way when he moves to music - he's not "copying" my moves for the most part. But learning songs, he does sing to the "right" tune. Where does visual art fit in? Is it best to model, to let them have complete free reign, or do a bit of both?

I will add that I have never had any issue with doing playdough with Silas. For some reason "modeling" that activity has never sent up warning bells for me. It's more drawing, painting, coloring, etc. that send up my worry flags. And really, I wonder if it's because those are the activities that I have the least confidence about my own abilities. Hmmm.

[Robyn L. Coburn]

Jayn and I constantly do art together, whether it is drawing, painting, sculpting or modelling, dying, sewing. I am an art doll maker, and Jayn really wants to be part of every process, to the point where she sometimes wants to take over. If I am making a doll for sale, that can't really happen, but I have found that she has the best taste in color choices and I have her choose the yarns for the figure's hair.

Her advice invariably is wonderful - she told me to shorten the skirt on one doll and presto it solved all my problems. It is not her artistic sensibilities that are at all immature, only her physical abilities to draw or stitch. So I have no fears that being a competence model for her means suppressing her own creativity at all.

On the rare occasions that she has had access to some kind of How-To-Draw publication, usually given by well meaning relatives, she usually explores briefly the proffered techniques, then shrugs them off and returns to her own methods. She is not interested in being told how to do anything!

Generally when we are making art together, she is doing her illustrations, I am doing my sketches, so we are together and working in the same space with the same tools, but our projects are separate. It's just like parallel play with toddlers. :)

I remember when she was young, what she needed from me was to function as a directly involved assistant. I would take the finished paper painting from the easel, lay it to dry and pull down the roll for the next piece. I would make sure the supplies are handy and replace all the lids on pens, wash the brushes, tidy the workspace. I have pretty much every piece of paper that she has ever marked put away in file boxes - that is other than the pieces we framed to hang.

Nowadays she likes me to prepare her stuff and help her gather her materials together. When we do polymer clay, I do the boring conditioning work, so that she can sculpt. I fetch the new paper and find the clipboards. I thread the needles. I sort the markers by color. She now remembers to replace the lids herself.

[Chessa]

Thanks, Bonnie, this is really helpful. Modeling the joy of creating is a really liberating way to think of it for me. And the idea of being his partner (problem solving) rather than teaching the "right" way is a much more comfortable place for me. And we take his art seriously - our walls are covered! :)

Now the confidence in my own ideas (when it comes to visual art) might take me a while, but I can probably fake it until I make it. He's not a very harsh critic. ;)

[Bonnie]

I can't edit, so I want to clarify this part: "And by all means, if there's something he wants to do, and you know a way to do it that he doesn't, show him!" What I mean by that is if he can't figure out something or seems stuck, it's not imposing on him to offer help. If he seems agitated or doesn't want help, then I'd back off, because it probably means he's determined to find a solution on his own. But there's nothing stifling about offering new ideas when he's open to hearing them.

[Bonnie]

You're thinking of modeling as interfering with his creative process, but modeling isn't always a bad thing! Instead of modeling the "right" way to do art (which really, having a "right" way almost goes against the definition of art), model the joy of creating. Make mistakes on purpose, try things even if you don't think they'll work. (Maybe this is really about more than just art.) Think of new ways to use materials besides how they're designed to be used. I don't mean sit him down and say "Today we're going to use paint THIS way", but just grab some materials and do whatever comes to mind.

Help him think of ways to "do" art that he might not think of on his own. Maybe he loves fingerpaint but doesn't know about tempera paint. Maybe he likes to draw on paper but has never drawn on cardboard or a brown paper bag or canvas or plastic or glass (they even make washable window markers). Collect things that might not even seem like art materials - buttons, leaves, pieces of string or cloth, even things you might think of as trash, like candy wrappers. Even if you can't think of anything to do with them, trust that if he finds meaning in them he will find a use for them. Take his art seriously, even if it doesn't look like much. And by all means, if there's something he wants to do, and you know a way to do it that he doesn't, show him! Present it as "Well, here's how I usually do it" or "Maybe this would work" NOT "This is the RIGHT way." (Again, this is about way more than art.) Show him the way you'd show a friend who asked for help.

The most important thing you can model with art (and other things too!) is an open mind and confidence in your own ideas.

[Chessa]

Thanks, Michael. I think I'll do that right now. :)

[Michael]

You may want to post this in the forum too; I think you'll be more likely to get responses there than on your own blog. Folks will be a bit more likely to see it.