WE ARE UNSCHOOLERS

[Morgan Hancock]

(Disclaimer: I respect all parents’ educational choices. There are many alternatives to education. This article is not meant to be critical or even persuasive, it is simply our personal journey. Enjoy.)

“Unschooling?! Isn’t that just for the liberal, atheist, hippy type of homeschoolers?”

Or, at least, that’s what I asked myself the first time I heard about a conservative, Christian family choosing to unschool their children. 

But, I listened to their case, kept an open mind, and fell in love.

Unschooling, in short, is allowing your child as much freedom to learn as you can possibly bear. For us, it means no set curriculum, no assignments, no lesson plans, no tests– in essence, no school! My children learn what they want, when they want, and how they want, in the belief that education should be fun, passion-driven, and voluntary.

(Stop right there. I know what you are thinking: “But what about math? How will they ever learn math?!” I will get to the “math issue” later, in another article, but for now it will suffice to say that math can be found in the most surprisingly fun places, such as board games, cooking, music, building things – oh, and my favorite, buying things!

In addition, I find it ironic that I usually get the “math question” from people who never use anything beyond basic,

practical mathematics in their career or daily life. Strange. Oh well, moving on...)

When I first pulled my son out of public school we took the traditional approach to homeschooling, i.e. we did school-at-home. We bought packaged curriculum, had set school hours, a classroom, and all the works. Although I wouldn’t describe our initial homeschooling days as bad, we weren’t having the joyful, rich, and exciting learning experience I had romanticized about when first deciding to homeschool.

My older son certainly loved being home with me and little his brother, but he would sigh in dread as he sat down to do certain subjects and he would count down the hours until school was over. I didn’t pay this too much mind, as I assumed this was how homeschooling was supposed to be! I figured lesson plans, worksheets, buying curriculum, and long days battling over fractions or forcing my wild-at-heart, outdoorsman of a boy to read books like “Little House on the Prairie,” was the price a parent had to pay to be a good home educator – and I was willing to do it forever.

Until, that is, I realized there is another way!

I became enthralled with the unschooling philosophy and read every book, article, or blog post written on the subject. It was like a veil had been lifted – one of those major “aha” moments.

It’s funny because we have all said at some point that “learning should be fun,” but in reality that usually just meant we would find a way to teach something with a slightly more hands-on approach or try incorporating a game into our lesson, but it is neverreally much more fun and the children still view it as school work.

But with unschooling, school really is fun. Better put, life is really fun. Now that we have started unschooling, learning is not a chore that I have to force my kids to finish before they can go do whatever it is they want to do. Instead, learning no longer has a beginning or end because, for us, living is learning. We don’t disassociate learning from living by putting it in a set building, for a set time, with set subjects.

And again, I know what you are thinking, “But, as a parent, and especially as a Christian parent, isn’t it our duty to ‘train our children in the way they should go...,’?”

My answer is: definitely! As parents, we should certainly give our children covering, training, and guidance -- and unschooling allows us to do that in a less directive, prescriptive, and forced approach. Instead, we guide our children with an approach that is more respectful, thoughtful, and relationship building.

Don’t confuse this approach with me “being a friend and not a parent,” because that is certainly not the dynamic in our house. We still have chores, we still require good manners, respect and obedience -- but under the umbrella of all that -- we allow A LOT of freedom.

I have read articles and books that attempt to lay out scriptural arguments for homeschooling, but I will not do that here. Why? Because, frankly, I don’t think God cares if you homeschool your children or not.  (cue gasp from the legalists!) That’s right, I don’t think He cares whether your children go to public school, private school, homeschool or are unschooled. God only cares that you walk with Him in whatever path you choose.

That being said, even though I don’t think God prefers one method of education over another, I do know that he prefers joy and freedom over misery and slavery. I think it is a shame that so many people carry life around like a heavy burden. It doesn’t have to be that way – and choosing to unschool, for us, has been a burden lifter.

I choose to unschool my kids for five main reasons:

       1.)Our earthly life is short – and no one will say on their death bed that they wish they had done more calculus worksheets.

   2.) Because God created each one of us unique from the next and I believe that unique individuals learn best when they are not forced, but rather when they learn something out of personal interest or need.

   3.)Because people (and yes, children are people too) appreciate and long for freedom.

   4.)Because living out a principle is always a more effective way to lead than enforcing a rule. (Be the change you want to see in your children!)

   5.)Because I would rather spend time getting to know who my children are, than telling them who they need to be.

After all, my children are not really my own, they belong to God and He has entrusted me with them. This season of my life, this season of having children home with me, will only last but a moment.  I want that moment to be rich with joy, communion, adventure, love, trust, memories, freedom and most of all, grace. I don’t worry that allowing my children the freedom to choose what they learn or don’t learn will hurt their chances of “succeeding in the real world,” whatever that even means. 

In the end, the most important human skills, i.e., humility, courage, compassion, sense of wonder, ability to forgive, resourcefulness, or faithfulness, can’t be measured on a test but can only be lived out.  Some may call us radical, and I’d have to agree. We are radically joyful, radically passionate, radically adventurous, radically in love, and radically free. 

We are unschoolers. 

Copied from my blog at: http://ayearwithoutschool.blogspot.com/

[Mama Flip]

This is such a beautifully written piece. And I mean that with all that I got. You brought me to tears. I hope you have a wonderful night. This is EXACTLY the sort of thing I LOVE to see. Hope to chat with some of you sometime. I'm brand spankin' new here. *waves* Take care.

[Lisa Kaed]

I found that unschooling and some many major Christian principals went together nicely.  Treat others how you want to be treated.  It's also our responsibility to raise our children up in the way they should go.  Isn't it best to do that by being a good example.  The idea that God has a purpose for each one of us. So I take that as I shouldn't be forcing my  plans upon my child.   God gave us all free will even my children and I shouldn't take it from them. We can guide but it their choices. Jesus saves.  We don't have to be our children's saviors.  whew. Love your neighbor.   I enjoy Christian Bible study but I've also found it's not always carried out the way I think it should.  This is just a quick post. Maybe I'll post a more thought out one later.

[Meredith]

none of which, I should add, has anything to do with whether or not you're an unschooler - I'm not trying to establish some kind of litmus test! I remember how confused I was, back in the day, though, and like to try to clarify when I can in hopes of avoiding hurt feelings.

[Meredith]

One of the common misconceptions people develop when they see the words "radical unschooling" for the first time is to assume it's just like any other kind of unschooling -  "as much freedom as the parents can bear" unschooling - but done by people with "radical" ideas about one thing or another. For the purposes of this network, it's good to know that in this case "radical" specifically modifies the term "unschooling" - it is unschooling to the core (radical).

 

At the core of unschooling are some key assumptions about learning itself (not freedom! the perception of freedom is a side-effect). Learning is a natural human endeavor - that's the easy part. Learning is also utterly dependent on the perceptions and perspectives of the learners - that's the complex part, the part that bogs adults down. Because learning is utterly dependent on the perceptions and perspectives of the learner, teaching is unreliable. Not bad, not unethical, unreliable. What Is reliable in terms of learning is that people (including children) seek to learn from people they care about. That's they key reason why radical unschooling families don't have chores and Do have friendships between parents and children. The chores can't be relied upon to teach what they're designed to teach. But people learn from their friends all the time.

 

Probably the most radical-as-in-different aspect of radical unschooling is this: extending friendship to children doesn't ruin them. It's okay to be friends with your kids. Really really. It's even good for them, and you, and the family as a whole.